Difficult Conversations: Nine Common Mistakes

Mistake #9: We lose sight of the goal. The key in any tough talk is to always keep sight of the goal. Help prevent this by going into conversations with a clear, realistic preferred outcome; the knowledge of how you want your working relationship with your counterpart to be; and having done some careful thinking about any obstacles that could interfere with either. (Remember, "winning" is not a realistic outcome, since your counterpart is unlikely to accept an outcome of "losing.") If you've done the exercise described in Slide 7, this should be easier. And you'll be less likely to get thrown off course by either thwarting ploys or your own emotions